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Hidden in plain sight, every MLB team’s website links to a list of its player’s walk-up and warmup song choices. The lists feature rosters updated for 2017, but some of the information appears to be outdated as not all of the songs named are the players’ actual songs for this season. But because these lists exist on official team websites and appear to represent the most recent and most comprehensive effort at documenting every MLB player’s associated music, I seized my discovery of said lists as an excuse to comb through every one compiling a master ranking of the best songs used to accompany baseball players.

Again: Some of these are likely now inaccurate. But as best as I can figure out, all the players listed have used song in question at some point. I included a couple not named on the MLB.com master list that I confirmed with my own ears by hearing them at ballparks.

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This ranking is based on a variety of criteria, including the quality of the song itself and the originality of the choice. I leaned toward song choices that I find especially entertaining, as baseball is for entertainment. I mostly ignored the songs and artists picked most frequently, because way too many guys use Drake, Sweet Home Alabama, AC/DC, Daddy Yankee, Jason Aldean, and someone named Brantley Gilbert. It seems like every team has a guy using the Red Hot Chili Peppers’ Can’t Stop.

If this list appears biased toward songs I personally enjoy, that’s OK: It so happens my opinions are the correct ones.

EXPLICIT CONTENT WARNING: Many of the following videos include explicit lyrics and/or suggestive imagery. The video for song No. 59, the one chosen by Padres’ infielder Allen Cordoba, probably should not be watched in any sort of workplace.

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73. Chad Qualls: Killing in the Name Of

Chad Qualls will not do what you tell him. Presumably he’s done warming up by the time that part comes on, and I’m not sure the Rockies would abide that. Somewhat predictably, a bunch of guys use Rage Against the Machine songs. Ol’ Chad Qualls here stands in for all of them. Most of their songs open pretty triumphantly, so they’re always a solid if easy choice.

72. Scott Kazmir: Kashmir

A handful of guys use it, but Kazmir gets the nod for the name connection, and Zeppelin needs to be on the list somewhere.

71. Cameron Maybin: Look Alive

70. Shin-Soo Choo: Regulate

Oh hell yes, Shin-Soo Choo.

69. Alex Colome: Tiempos

I had never heard this song before but it makes me want to break stuff. Colome’s a really good closer, which adds some weight.

68. Howie Kendrick: Dey Know

Good horn sample to herald a forthcoming Howie Kendrick at-bat.

67. Brad Miller: Tha Crossroads

The first of three Bone Thugs-N-Harmony songs on this list. Apparently they’re enjoying a revival among baseball player. At the outset of compiling this, I would’ve guessed Miller would land higher. But choosing Bone Thugs’ biggest hit counts as a mark against him.

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66. Chase d’Arnaud: Pony

Late-90s R&B seems to be huge among baseball players right now. I’m very much for it.

65. Nick Hundley: Shine

Here for its randomness.

64. Chris Carter: Mr. Carter

63. Zac Curtis: God’s Gonna Cut You Down

This song was huge among big-league relievers for a couple years and still shows up as the warmup jam for a few bullpen arms. It remains a badass choice, even if it’s a bit overused by now. I remember lefty Joe Beimel as a pioneer of its usage.

62. A.J. Ramos: Power

Might be a better choice for teammate Giancarlo Stanton.

61. Juan Lagares: Hot in Herre

I aspire to someday Ted be as good as Nelly at randomly inserting my name into the middle of sentences.

60. Mallex Smith: Head Bussa

Mallex Smith probably heard himself described as “scrappy” a thousand times before deciding to go with a Lil Scrappy banger.

59. Allen Cordoba: Fever

Really, don’t click on the video if anyone can see your computer screen. It’s pretty much all butts.

58. Ryon Healy: No Diggity

I always link No Diggity with two other bumping ’90s R&B jams. All three land somewhere on this list. I’ll tell you when we get there.

57. Francisco Cervelli: That’s Amore

Points for creativity, singability.

56. Andrew Bailey: Sweet Dreams

Pretty bleak, Andrew Bailey. Industrial rock and alternative metal are fairly common, but this is especially plodding and ominous.

55. Brandon Finnegan: Bump In The Trunk

Yes!

54. Adrian Gonzalez: El Mariachi Loco

53. Chad Pinder: Whoomp! (There it is)

Also a song used by multiple dudes. Still funny.

52. Nori Aoki: Johnny B. Goode

51. Chris Hatcher: Let Me Clear My Throat

Fun fact: About a decade ago, I wrote a list of recommended unused closer songs. This was on it, and it’s good someone’s going with it. Turns the ballpark into a party.

50. Brandon Belt: All I Do Is Win

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Hard to believe there aren’t 30 players using this.

49. Tyler Glasnow: Smooth Operator

Came out four years before Tyler Glasnow was born.

48. Evan Scribner: Epic Sax Guy

47. Michael Martinez: Te De Campana

I was not familiar with this song, but Michael Martinez’s awesome hair implies good taste in music. This is a jam.

46. Josh Phegley: My Brain is Hanging Upside Down

There are so few punk songs in use. Last year, Phegley used the Mighty Mighty Bosstones’ The Impression That I Get. He’s turning in his plaid blazer for a leather jacket, apparently.

45. Wade Davis: Ackrite

44. Byron Buxton: Return of the Mack

No. 2 in the aforementioned No Diggity trio.

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43. Clay Buchholz: Hold The Line

I want so badly for Clay Buchholz to be a huge Toto fan.

42. Randal Grichuk: Here Comes The Boom

Somehow, Randal Grichuk is the only dude on the Cardinals using Nelly. Embarrassing. Every guy on the Cardinals should use Nelly.

41. Mike Fiers: Saw (theme)

40. George Springer: Bouncin’ Back

Funky as heck.

39. Kelvin Herrera: El Abayarde

38. Matt Garza: All Eyez On Me

37. Carlos Carrasco: Summer of ’69

Bryan Adams. Nice.

36. Jesse Hahn: Monstar’s Anthem

Were the Monstars quietly the greatest rap supergroup ever assembled? Discuss.

35. Derek Holland: Dark Knight Rises

A few guys go with movie and/or TV themes. They all have the capacity to make a player entering a baseball game seem far more epic an event than it actually is. For it.

34. Austin Romine: Bad Boys

33. Adam Eaton: This Is How We Do It

The third and best entry in the No Diggity group.

32. Derek Law: I Fought The Law

Oh, I get it! More guys should use The Clash. If there’s ever again a player named Rudy, he needs to use Rudie Can’t Fail or get DFA’d immediately.

31. Joaquin Benoit: Fireball

Benoit throws pretty hard, so “Fireball” seems appropriate. Plus this song makes my hips shimmy involuntarily.

30. Tom Koehler: Still Fly

Tom Koehler seems pretty cool. We need to bring back the use of “fly.”

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29. Miguel Gonzalez: El Hijo Del Pueblo

28. Brent Suter: Jurassic Park (theme)

27. Dillon Gee: Nuthin’ But A G Thang

Obviously.

26. Trevor Cahill: White Rabbit

Not the direction I would’ve guessed for Trevor Cahill. Pretty trippy.

25. Clayton Richard: Ignition (remix)

Bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce.

24. Zach Davies: It’s Tricky

23. Didi Gregorius: Notorious B.I.G.

“Notorious” sounds just like “Gregorius.” It plays.

22. Todd Frazier: Fly Me To The Moon

Frazier reps New Jersey so hard.

21. Cory Gearrin: Welcome To the Terrordome

20. Trevor Plouffe: Shine On You Crazy Diamond

I assume this isn’t the case, but it’d be pretty good if Trevor Plouffe made the whole stadium wait 26 minutes for the PA to play all parts of Shine On You Crazy Diamond in their entirety before every one of his at-bats. Probably Rob Manfred wouldn’t go for that.

19. John Lackey: Friends in Low Places

Is this song annoying? Yeah, it’s pretty annoying. But it’s so good for John Lackey, a guy who seems like he’s probably thrown down at a honky-tonk more than once.

18. Felix Hernandez: Down With The King

Being nicknamed “King Felix” opens up a lot of options. This is a good one.

17. Zack Greinke: Boulevard of Broken Dreams

Maybe shouldn’t have signed with the Diamondbacks.

16. Jacob May: Beware

Big Pun? Let’s hang out, Jacob May.

15. Bryce Harper: Feelin’ Good

Very few guys in the Majors could pull off Michael Buble songs. Harper is one of them.

14. Noah Syndergaard: Game of Thrones

When you look like Noah Syndergaard and throw like Noah Syndergaard, there’s really no wrong direction you could take with your warmup music. This works, but so would Why Can’t We Be Friends?

13. Robbie Ross: Man of Constant Sorrow

Now Fenway Park’s a hoedown.

12. Dustin Pedroia: Real (Expletive) G’s

You might not associate Dustin Pedroia with classic gangsta rap, but Pedroia plays with a chip on his shoulder that makes a diss track seem appropriate.

11. Kendrys Morales: In The Summertime

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He’s not trying to be ironic or anything. Kendrys Morales just digs this song:

10. Andrew Miller: Beat It

Michael Jackson songs are generally underused. Miller is good enough to pull off just enough anything.

9. Henry Owens: Fame

Funky, freaky. Owens is in Class AAA right now, denying Red Sox fans their Bowie.

8. Sonny Gray: Stacy’s Mom

What?

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7. Taylor Jungmann: YMCA

It’d be silly enough on it’s own, but wait: Jungmann, there’s no need to feel down, I said, Jungmann, pick yourself off the ground. Overplayed in stadiums, certainly, but completely underused as a funny warmup choice. <

6. Wilmer Flores: I’ll Be There For You

True story: Long before Flores became a fan favorite in New York, he learned English by watching every episode of Friends.

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5. Joe Biagini: One

As in “is the loneliest number.” It’s so sad! Last year, Biagini used Tears Of A Clown. Joe Biagini rules. All relievers should emulate Joe Biagini. Shoutout to disco John Lennon in the pink scarf really owning those backup vocals and handclaps in the video.

4. Kyle Schwarber: Thuggish Ruggish Bone

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Schwarber’s an Ohio native, so he’s got a good claim to using Bone Thugs. But also — and I have no idea what this is the case — if someone came up to me and asked, “which player is baseball’s most ‘ruggish bone?'” I’d almost certainly say Schwarber. I don’t know what ruggish means but I believe it describes Kyle Schwarber.

3. Jake Lamb: Shoop

Girls, what’s my weakness? Late ’90s R&B.

2. Francisco Lindor: The Humpty Dance

Easily the best development of the 2017 season to date is that Francisco Lindor, budding megastar, is using The Humpty Dance. Damn near looptid.

1. Yoenis Cespedes: Circle of Life (intro)

The main thing about Cespedes is that it feels like he’s about to hit a home run literally every time he walks to the plate. The opening notes of The Lion King make the perfect accompaniment: recognizable, dramatic, and full of wonder. It’s funny and beautiful and spectacular.